Friday, June 01, 2007

My Dad


Just recently I was with my 93-year-old dad who is suffering with memory problems, tentatively diagnosed as Alzheimers. He's living in a care center in Norwalk, Iowa.

My sis-in-law, Barbara Bougher, visited with me. We stopped at Walgreens first to get a few prizes for him: snickers candy, an I-love-you card, some reading glasses, a pen and pad of paper, tucked in a colorful gift bag. Oh, and one of those fun rubber balls with fringe-like stuff all over it, and very squishy. He loved it.


We laughed as Dad tossed the fuzzy ball to Barb. He was teasing her. This was a spark of the dad I know...

He laughed and we laughed.

Then he suddenly got a blank look on his face and stopped, just sat there and stared into nothingness.

Alzheimers is a thief. It has stolen my dad from me. My once funny, smart, very loving father who never hurt a soul, is lost in a fuzzy world with only momentary flashes of memory.

Although he doesn't always know at first who I am when I visit, when it does click in his dimming mind, it's a huge treasure for me.

One of those gems was handed to me this week. He looked into my eyes for a long time and finally spoke some broken words: "I used to carry you..." I cried then.

Then he spoke these struggling words, "I'm in bad shape." He knows he can't remember. He knows things are fuzzy. He feels out of control. Then Barb and I both cried.

He was quite attentive to the scripture as I read to him. We prayed and hugged his neck and kissed his cheeks and wiped his eyes for him... And promised we'd be back.

I hope he still knows me when I return.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness- Mrs. Jean I want to come with you next time. My heart is broken- "I used to carry you", if I could cry I wold (ever since my parents, it is hard). What a touching story. I understand the pain. Pain is pain and it runs deep. I pray for your strength for him and his strength to carry on till the next glory.

Amen to that!

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness I was told never to have a grammatical error on an email to the Ohlerking's... opps! I meant to say "would". ;)

Jean Ohlerking said...

Thanks for reading my posts. I don't care if you make a spelling error or grammatical goof. I just like that you commented! Thanks!

I do tend to "edit" everything I read however. I think it's from doing so much editing over the years.

Thanks for your sweet comments about my dad. I have been blessed to have such a great one. A true example of our Heavenly Father in my life.

Gina Witcher / Runnermom4 said...

Wow, you must have amazing genes in your family. What a blessing to have your dad around in his 90's. And he looks great. I wish any of my grandparents were here and fear my parents will die in their 70's. I know it's got to be hard though when health and memory make them a different person. My grandmother had dimentia. You and your sister and your father will be in my prayers.

merrill5 said...

oh Miss Jean i'm so sorry.
I love you
c-